Saturday, January 31, 2015

You're not finished with me yet...

Hello out there - it's been a while.  More than a year, in fact.  

Grad school has a tendency to take over everything, and while I find my work interesting and challenging, it's not the sort of narrative that I feel called to share at this point.  In deference to how this blog began, searching for starfish means paying attention to my work, and that has meant (and will probably continue to mean) that my posts will be limited.

I never intended to shut this operation down, and I still don't intend to, but the one who invited me to begin blogging is now inviting me deeper inward.  In addition to school, which would be plenty to stand in the way of writing, there is this bigger piece, the story I do feel called to share, and that's the part I have a hard time articulating right now.

I had a professor in undergrad who told us that all we could say about God was that, "God is," and that even that was saying too much.  Because every box I try to put God in, God blasts right through it and insists on not being contained.

We learn in quantum mechanics that confinement leads to quantization, that discreteness arises from containment.  God is in everything, refuses to be rationed out, but instead shows up to all of us everywhere.  And what does that mean for us?  I chew on ideas such as these as I ponder the more "practical" applications of my science.

And perhaps all that I can say is this: as I continue to show up to my education, I come to know and love a God who first knew and loved me, who has gifted us with a beautifully interesting universe and filled it with beautiful people.  

I also wanted to make this hiatus "official" because I know that I will be preparing for my oral exam in the summer.  I have to pass this exam in order to qualify for PhD candidacy.  If you're a pray-er, I would ask for your prayers this semester and into the summer as I navigate this next part of the journey.  

And know that all of you, wherever you are, you have my prayers, too.  

Peace and all good,